(originally written approx. 3 weeks ago)
As I sit here nervously gnawing into a bar of chocolate, waiting to board the flight from Cochabamba to La Paz, I started thinking of all the things I would rather do than fly in an airplane. Now those of you that know me well are aware of my irrational fear of aviation and I will declare it again: I HATE FLYING! People ask me how I can be scared of flying ... hmm let's see, maybe it's the fact that you're traveling at a high rate of speed 30,000 Feet in the air in a piece of TIN. How can you NOT be scared?! I think the only way I would feel 100% comfortable on a flight is by being drugged into a medically induced coma before boarding. All of a sudden, psychiatric help is starting to appeal to me now ...
Ok enough with the sob story. enjoy.
THINGS I WOULD RATHER DO THAN FLY
1.) Lick a handrail
2.) Start a conga line in the cafeteria
3.) Climb Tunari barefoot (if you do not know what this is, look it up.)
4.) Serenade a random stranger
5.) Travel via bus
6.) Travel via train
7.) Travel via subway
8.) Travel via boat
9.) Travel via Big Wheel
10.) TRAVEL VIA ANYTHING THAT DOES NOT LAUNCH ME 5,000,000,000 FEET INTO THE AIR
11.) Give a speech on nuclear physics. in Spanish
12.) Fast for a day
13.) Sleep in a hut for a week
14.) Walk
15.) Eat an entire plate of chuño (again, look this up.)
16.) Ride an ostrich
17.) Go fishing
18.) Stub my toe
19.) Sing the Bolivian national anthem at a futbol game
20.) Babysit
21.) Decorate a Christmas tree
22.) Community Service
23.) Learn Icelandic
24.) Yodel
25.) Contemplate Stoicism
26.) Meet Evo Morales
27.) Donate blood
28.) Wear a dress made entirely of barf bags (and really? How is anyone supposed to vomit in one of these things? Have you seen them? They are tiny! We need some Hefty up in here ...)
29.) Pushups. Enough said.
30.) Swim in the Caribbean
31.) Dog movie marathon, you know the ones where the good ol the poor family dog saves child from drowning in a well / being eaten by a bear / a runaway hot-air balloon and so on.
38 minutes later ...
Oh hey! I'm in LA PAZ!
Hahaha... I'm not laughing at your fear of stepping into a plane that is about to take off, but about your creative alternative choices.
ReplyDeleteTunari barefoot... I would come with you since I never got much higher than Kaspicancha because of a friend with altitude sickness... Well... but I would hide a pair of shoes for you in my backpack... just in case... hahaha. And chuno... you must be kidding... lol
And about lists... I had one that I used to work on when I was frustrated: things I will miss about UAB/Bolivia (the incredible bus system, dear friends, being "special" just because being "extranjera"...lol, Friday night pizza, having a reason to justify drinking Coca Cola, slowing life down by washing clothes by hand, being able to afford going to a restaurant once in a while,...) and things I'm looking forward to when coming home (hot bath tub, piano at home, BREAD, people who are on time, family, people who understand my line of arguement, churches with a sound system that doesn't give you a headache (the new university church actually isn't that bad though), MY room, no more diarrhea, no more changing clothes 4-6 times a day because of funny cafeteria dress code,...).
Well, and next time, just take the bus to La Paz and you might realize, that it might be safer to take a plane in Bolivia... (fortunately, they finished the alternative route to Death Road from La Paz down into the jungle... I did Death Road twice in 2006 and I venture an assured guess that Death Road wouldn't be on your list after watching some videos on youtube and reading some interesting statistics...). Planes aren't the worst choice in Bolivia...